Job Hunting Blues

Am I Really That Much of a Loser?

When I left my corporate job in the city I knew I was taking a risk.  Leaving a cushy, well-paying job without having something new lined up is a dive off the deep end. 

It’s been nearly six months since I quit, and about three weeks into a serious job search, with only one real interview to show for it.  I’m starting to get depressed – it’s like knowing that everybody in your high school class has a date to the Prom while you’re sitting home alone, all dressed up but no offers to dance. (And no, I was never invited to Prom, so I know the feeling well).

I have to keep reminding myself that I had very valid reasons for leaving my job, not the least of which was the fact that my boss (The Sadist) more or less told me he was going to fire me the next time I made a mistake.  Humans make mistakes, ergo…  I decided to leave on my own terms with my head held high, thank you very much.

The other reasons for quitting I could have lived with individually, but when combined into the daily soup of misery that was my existence, I just couldn’t deal anymore.  Let us recap, shall we?

1)    The grinding, 2-hours-each-way commute.  Leaving the house at 7 a.m. and getting home at 7:30 or 8:00 at night.  You try it and see how long you last.  I did it for eleven years.

2)    A toxic work environment that had people being thrown under buses right and left, bad behavior being rewarded (please, please vent in the comments section!), and those who were truly trying to do the right thing being punished (promotions and raises withheld, getting yelled at for stupid stuff, etc.)

3)    The soul-killing reality that is Corporate America.  Everybody deals with this crap, and I put up with it too and probably will have to again, but I needed a break after 25 years of Office Bullshit.  The list of said crap is endless, but my personal favorite is Corporate Buzzwords, specifically “Granularity”.  As in, “What is the granularity of our criteria for this project?”  That one makes my stomach churn.  Please share your personal favorites.

I had lunch with an old friend recently.  She survived late-stage cancer and has a newfound perspective on priorities in life.  Luckily I was able to come to the same conclusion without having to stare Death in the face.  Upshot:  you can put up with a lot of pain and suffering in life if you have to in order to survive, but once you have the option of leaving it behind, you’d be a fool not to.  Life, pardon the old saw, is way too short.

That said, I’m now faced with a long, hard slog to find a new job that pays enough to cover the bills, doesn’t require flying to the moon and back every day, and is somewhat mentally stimulating.

So far, apparently, that’s asking a bit too much of the world.

I’ll keep you posted.